Compliments, no matter from whom they are coming, men think they are true. I strongly believe, this is core wired into man’s mind that every compliment for him is true, no matter whom they are coming from. As soon as a man hear some compliment his inner self (I believe “ego” is the right word) get boosted. He starts losing his own control over his mind to his own ego. And a chain reaction, rather I should say a negative chain reaction, gets triggered. The most common steps of this chain reaction are as below–
- Men hear compliments.
- He starts believing in that.
- His confidence over complimented thing grows up.
- He thinks on compliment again or gets complimented once again. His confidence grows even more.
- He thinks about compliment for more times, he pushes that good feeling and confidence to very high level until his confidence becomes Over Confidence.
- His overconfidence makes him take wrong decisions.
- He still appreciates because of his higher level of ego.
- He got to hit something really unacceptable.
- And finally crashed back to scattered ego and low confidence.
All men’s are like this. Every man is highly prone to compliments. You can easily relate yourself to this chain. Just imagine, what could be the chain reaction if multiple compliments come from a beautiful woman? Probably, the chain reaction becomes shorter and you directly hit 9th step pretty soon.
Women take compliments much differently if not completely. Women hear the compliment clearly, judge the gesture of the person it is coming from, think about it again, try to find out its truth from her knowledge about self, then accepts or rejects it. Remember, it is always hard to impress a woman by fake compliments or overly compliments. These things just make women off and nothing less. But such over compliments and even fake compliments work like magic to any men.
Please shed your ego and learn from women. Listen to compliments carefully, doubt them for once, analyze them for their reality, and if (only if) you found they are true then PLEASE take them as encouragement only.
Men want to hear good about himself from anyone, especially women. And women usually don’t throw compliments and this makes men’s hunger for compliments bigger. And as soon as compliments hit men’s ears, they start believing it.
Not all compliments are dangerous. We, men, have to develop that piece of mind which analyses before believing it. That’s it. Those appreciations which come from wife, parents, and children are normally genuine. And compliments from other people are also honest in general. The only thing we need to take care is that we don’t overly accept them, push ego up, and don’t let confidence turn into overconfidence.
There are some HIGH ALERT compliments, the Most Dangerous ones. The majority of them come from women. Few examples —
- From Women — Those compliments which trigger feelings of protector. I must rate such compliments as the MOST dangerous among all. Consider the following sentences from women for yourself-
- “I feel safe with you”
- “I believe you more than myself”
- “I like how caring you are for me”
- “I feel very good when you think of me”
- “I know you can do anything for me, and I love that”
Such compliments make men serious about women and they start thinking about her protection. If these compliments come from wife think they are so good, but in case they come from other women then just imagine how dangerous they could go. Men convert into her protector almost instantly and put his efforts, time, money and more important feeling at a wrong place.
- From Women — Those compliments which are related to men’s appearance or mental capabilities. No doubt such compliments are so fast and so strong in their effect that man instantly converts into someone else. He instantly loses his reality and picks his own image of higher level & start believing in it. These appreciations are those under which influence men become a fool very quick. Few examples are —
- “You are looking handsome”
- “You drive so well”
- “You are looking so manly today”
- “Your sense of humor is so good”
- “Your smile is so pleasant”
- “You speak so convincingly”
- And much more. You got the idea, right.
- From Women — Anything which gives a sense of pleasing her. Not necessary, they are compliments, these could be simple and straightforward words. Anything which gives an impression on men that women feel good because of him. Some examples-
- “Thank you so much, dear”
- “So nice of you”
- “You made me relax now”
- “I am on the seventh sky because of you”
- “You are so pleasing”
- “You have got so good manners, I am impressed”.
Such compliments put men in a mental situation where he wants to repeat such acts again and again. And as usual, he overdoes these acts and turns women off, and sometimes put himself in debt.
- From Parents — I cannot call them compliments, but defiantly they are not condemned. Many times parents say… “It’s okay” on children’s mistakes. Believe it or not, most men tend to do it to their children. Beware of it. This is not only harmful to your child, but also to everyone else. Few examples–
- “It’s okay child, your mistake is nothing serious”
- “Even old people make such mistakes, you are just a kid yet”
- “Don’t bother son, it happened so happened, it’s past now, forget and move ahead”
- “It’s not your fault child, it’s only the matter of time”
In conclusion, whenever you get compliments from anyone, just don’t take as it is. Think of them at least twice before taking them as true. Follow your heart; somewhere deep inside your heart, you know the real truth.